There’s no question that makes you doubt yourself quite like: “Why are you single?” You see, that’s not exactly what I hear them asking. What I hear is what is it about you that makes you so utterly undesirable? What are you hiding from us all that is repulsive to others?

The truth is I’m hiding nothing. I’m an extremely open and honest person but being in a couple has just as much to do with luck as it has to do with being a well adjusted normal person. Your loved up friends may not tell you this though, they don’t like to see it as luck.

My world is full of helpful people, well they believe they’re helpful at least. As a single woman I’m inundated with suggestions such as:

  • Maybe you’re just not putting yourself out there.
  • Perhaps you’re too independent.
  • Are you giving off the wrong vibe?
  • The guy for you is out there, you just gotta keep looking.
  • You’re too fussy.

If these were true, then only needy women, frantically searching for a husband and willing to settle would ever score online or on a Saturday night. None of your loved up friends are going to like that assumption! None of these suggestions are helpful! Not one! I think I have it a little easier than most women out there in that I don’t have a ticking biological clock screaming at me. I don’t see a deadline in this game. I’m also trying to see this as a project and am not in the least bit afraid to have some fun along the way.

I’m not out there searching frantically for a husband. I’m strong, forthright and independent. I don’t need a partner. It would however, be nice to have some icing on the cake that is my life. A like minded funny strong person to share my time with.

If I am too independent, fussy and sending out all the wrong vibes, then so be it. I’ll be fine as I am but please stop with these horrendous platitudes. Your single friends will thank you for it, I promise.

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